Mastering Self by Admitting My Faults

Can I just be real with you for a minute?

I am notoriously flaky and non-committal. I’ve been this way my entire life. I chalk it up to an overwhelming character flaw that has plagued my very existence. That and stinky feet.
It’s bizarre but my hubby always says:

“Babe, you are so hot- but your feet smell terrible. I mean, I’d still put your toes in my mouth, but you’d have to soak those babies in Epsom salt for at least 45 minutes.
But then, (he raises one eyebrow) it would be on!”

It is times like these, with my handsome hubby offering a solution and even a reward for my strange personal flaws that I wish the Universe would hit Ctrl- Alt- Delete and officially ‘End Program’ when it comes to my flakiness.

Yoga~ The One Step Problem Solver & Stain Remover

When I was in my 20’s my flakiness and non-committal attitude towards life was a blessing. I bounced from place to place, job to job and found myself in bizarre and amazing circumstances, surrounded by the most inspiring, quirky, ‘ain’t gonna tie me down’ type of people. Yet the older I get, I can’t help but want something more. This overwhelming desire to complete something, to finish something, to see something through to the end has become an incessant nagging that refuses to go away.

And then one day, I found something I knew would would fix all of my problems.

I swore to myself that

would be different.

Yoga would bring inner peace, balance and oneness to my chaotic, crazy life.
It would provide stability and discipline- forcing my flighty ass to ‘take a seat.’
I was determined to become a Yoga Guru; who would perform amazingly difficult poses with ease and grace.
I would study Yoga, practice Yoga and fully embody all things Yoga.

There was only one teeny, tiny problem…

Yoga~ The Guru Who Calls My Bullshit

Don’t get me wrong, I always have the best intentions.
Obsession and neurosis take center stage as we delve into something shiny and new.
But the realization eventually sets in- the pursuit of knowledge is much more fun, exciting and entertaining than taking action.

It’s not even an issue of laziness but rather a short attention span. Everyone wants a Yoga lifestyle and the new waist trainer, the cross fit body, the Instagram Teas, the new Kat Von D Eye-Shadow Pallet and the week long vacation backpacking through Europe.

We want all the things!

We are bombarded with an endless buffet of shiny, new things, all vying for our attention~
yetthere is another wrench pitched Babe Ruth style into everyone’s dream of Yogi Bliss.


Life can be busy, stressful and frustrating. It can leave even the most ambitiously inclined person up a creek, without a paddle. Before I knew what hit me, I was sucked in to the current of my usual habits, daily routines and busy work schedule. My dream of being a Yoga Guru took a back seat to, well, life.

Spirituality To Stop The Insanity

The saying is true: ‘A problem cannot be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.’ Analyzing the patterns forced me to take a step back and figure out why I could not stick with something as simple, beneficial and fun as Yoga.

If we look at this from a purely Spiritual perspective,

is my element.

My head is quite literally in the clouds and my heart is never far behind.  I flow effortlessly from one thing to the next and I welcome change with pure, childlike excitement.

It is no wonder my life has become a series of un-finished projects and good intentions left floating in the wind.

There is one element that I just cannot seem to wrap my head around…

Earth, is needed to maintain grounding, stability, growth and nourishment. Balance can never be achieved without these key ingredients. I had to find a way to incorporate these aspects into my life.

Yoga, quite literally, forced me to take time out of my extremely Air influenced existence, to plant my feet firmly on the ground.

Through Yoga I created

Becoming grounded and rooted within the Earth element, I planted seeds of knowledge, wisdom and intent. The key to my success was found in the discipline it took to return to the mat every single day.  As these seeds of intent grew, I became more firmly rooted in my perspective of self. My excuses, fears and faults seemed to drift farther and farther away. Here was the proof, sitting right in front of me ~ I really could accomplish anything I set my mind to.

The Moment of Bliss

So,this is it.  This is my reminder.  My mantra that encompasses all that I truly desire.

When I am feeling lost, frustrated and overwhelmed, I can find my purpose and motivation here.

It is so easy to let life get in the way of our journey. It is easy to live life on the sidelines and get caught up in the mundane to such a degree that we never actually live.

I realized that I could no longer continue to do the same thing and expect different results.
Sometimes we have to get out of our own way, see our faults and take action anyway. We must welcome the discipline we know we so desperately need and focus on grounding our Inner Guru.

We owe it to ourselves to make sure our life and every aspect thereof inspires others to to step off the sidelines, to let their fears and faults rise up in the pit of their stomach ~to grab their hand and leap off the edge anyway.


~ dex

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